And the scary season begins..
Nugget of the Week
Don’t be too quick to rule out an opportunity. I know I’ve recommended that you become discerning about which invitations to accept, but being hasty maybe a mistake.
One thing I have noticed is that if I feel a little fear or anxiety about an invitation, it’d be all too easy to immediately decline and use my need for replenishment as a reason (or excuse).
But here is what I’ve realised. Those very things that stop me in my tracks and question myself are quite possibly the things that will give me the opportunity to grow. And as human’s we’re pre-wired to learn & grow.
So the question I now ask myself is what could I learn about myself or my client base and their challenges by accepting this opportunity?
This simple question has delivered significant return on investment in terms of my knowledge, understanding and confidence. And if I’d declined, I’d be the poorer for it.
This Sh** Really Happened!
When I arrived in London on Monday afternoon, it was tipping down with rain, so I did what any sensible person would do and I took a Black Cab. Did I say sensible?
I thought I was being sensible, but there were several factors that I hadn’t accounted for. Lots of road closures and my driver – Alan.
I began to wonder if there was something wrong with Alan’s cab as it was behaving like a kangaroo; not a pleasant experience. I debated about mentioning this but could see he was an older guy who probably wouldn’t respond well to a woman questioning his driving.
After about 20 minutes of kangarooing at a snail’s pace, I said “Traffic is slow tonight Alan“. Talk about small-talk! But as we know, it’s the gateway conversation starter.
Alan then slid open the divider and said “It is, and forgive me I have a speech impediment.” I said that’s not a problem and we started a more meaningful conversation during which Alan told me in stilted fashion that he was lucky to be alive. Apparently, a few years ago he collapsed (previously undetected hole in his heart) and as he lived on his own, went a few days before someone found him. I immediately felt shame at my judgement of Alan’s kangaroo driving.
For the rest of the journey I was happy to engage Alan in meaningful conversation knowing that once his shift was over, he’d be going back to his empty flat, devoid of company of conversation until his next shift.
Introverts are human too and therefore need connection too. On our own terms.
Coming up, Buttercup!
I can’t look ahead to December without feeling mixed emotions – slight dread at the insanity that often prevails and excitement as I now have tools to handle this season.
Impending insanity because we’re now firmly into the so called ‘festive season’ but that’s not how it feels to many of us.
Of course we introverts will be expected to participate in all the extraverted gatherings with a smile on our face when we’d probably rather stay home and avoid all the noise. But, if we do that we know we’ll be judge as anti-social, boring, stick-in-the-muds. Either that or just plain rude!
However, we know that we’re not anti-social, we’re selectively social. We tend to operate on a different ‘channel’ and need our pre-charging, recharging and a side of intentional self-care.
So many years ago now, I came up with something that I am told time and time again has helped many introverts to cope with the festivities, show up to social gatherings and events whilst maintaining their sanity.
Intrigued?
Then you’ll want my Seasonal Sanity Savers.
They are daily hints, tips and self-care reminders for every day throughout December, not just Advent.
Why?
Because the stress and pressure of social, workplace and family expectations lasts for the whole month, so it makes sense to have support for the whole month.
What better way to counter feeling depleted and defeated than a daily nudge, a delicious moment of calm amidst the chaos and a pragmatic reminder to look after your wellbeing.
Of course, if you want to go through December feeling dread and despondency, you can always ignore this offer.
But if you’re ready for another way, sign-up here.
It costs you nothing and may just save your sanity!
Watch this amazing episode of
(dropping) Pebbles in the Pond,
featuring Frea O’Brien
Making a decision about when to play to which of your introverted strengths is a real gift that can move the needle when you’re feeling stuck. Frea gave us a challenge during her appearance on PITP which Shelley has already accepted and actioned.
Some of the Watch Buttons below will work closer or on the date of event only.
Hot off the Press
Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.
If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.
I look forward to you tuning in and always welcome and appreciate your feedback!
Cage Rattler & Bias Shifter – Helping organisations unlock potential by shifting extraversion bias | Coaching quiet leaders | TEDx Speaker | Trainer | Founder, CEO – Flourishing Introverts | Host – The Flourishing Introvert Talks and (dropping) Pebbles in the Pond | Author – The Flourishing Nudge | Co-Flourisher, Co-Founder – Intent to Flourish
That’s the type of conversation I had with one of my best friends this last week. I held the silence as he digested my words.
BTW, don’t believe anyone who tells you that you can ‘turn’ your inner critic into a fan – it doesn’t work like that. Anyway, Gladys snuck up on me when I was least expecting it this week and her intervention knocked me for six. 
However, we are far from ‘less than.’ When we recognise that we are ‘more than,’ we unlock our potential to create a life we love, to believe in ourselves, and to intentionally hold firm boundaries.
However, if we intentionally and consciously reframe how we look at challenges and obstacles, we can turn obstacles into opportunities for growth.
Fortunately, they transferred me to the ‘termination’ department who confirmed that the second agent had given me the right advice and they just needed to do one more thing their end!
However, we are far from ‘less than.’ When we recognise that we are ‘more than,’ we unlock our potential to create a life we love, to believe in ourselves, and to intentionally hold firm boundaries.
Taking note of our own actions, evaluating the impact of our choices, and ensuring they are in alignment with our authentic-self and our inner-purpose, feeds us the clarity we need.
This all left me feeling a bit wobbly, (watch out – comparisonitis alert!) as I was left wondering how such a (dare I say) uninspiring individual could have such a large following, yet despite so many people constantly telling me how inspiring and helpful they find my content – I have a far, far smaller following. 
However, we are far from ‘less than.’ When we recognise that we are ‘more than,’ we unlock our potential to create a life we love, to believe in ourselves, and to intentionally hold firm boundaries. My course is designed to guide you on this flourishing journey, empowering you to take control and make meaningful, lasting changes.