Playing to Introvert Strengths

Reflections Week 39 of 2025

What’s the difference between letting go and simply avoiding what feels uncomfortable?

Avoidance is about shoving things into the cupboard and hoping the door holds. The problem is, we introverts know that what’s hidden still weighs heavy in our minds.

Letting go is different. It’s the courageous choice to face the discomfort, name it for what it is, take the learning, and then release it. Avoidance numbs, but never heals.

Letting go clears the ground so we can grow.

If that lands for you, continue reading the message in Blue Box in the newsletter, as next I talk about how the seasons themselves can help us make peace with these shifts.

How can introverts reframe the changing seasons of life so they feel like opportunities rather than losses?

Each season is a mirror.

Autumn teaches us the beauty of release, winter gives us permission to rest, spring offers renewal, and summer lets us celebrate. When we see life this way, seasons stop being markers of decline and start being invitations to shift our energy.

As introverts, we can thrive when we align with these rhythms instead of fighting them. Loss turns into space. Change turns into opportunity.

To understand how I honour those seasons in my own life, even when it feels hard, check out the closing section in the newsletter.

There is never a good reason

to throw people under the bus

Nugget of the Week

I’m not if this is a nugget or a truth-b*mb, but here it is anyway. Identifying as an introvert does not necessarily limit you to a life of solitary confinement where you are unable to engage with life.

I’ve been shocked at some of the questions asked in many of the introvert groups on social media this week and it’s reinforced why I wanted Introvert’s Corner to be very different. The questions posed demonstrate clearly just how much misunderstanding there is about what introversion is and isn’t including the regular conflation of concepts and issues.

Here are a selection of some of the posts.

INTROVERTS on SOCIAL media, something doesn’t sound right
I’m single and I find it so hard to break the ice and talk to women.
Can introverts make friends?
I’m so introverted that I cry when go to public bathroom. What should I do?
Who just wants to stay in bed all day and never leave the house?
Most introverts are quiet because they are scared of people judging them
No matter how I try to blend with humans, I’m still alien.. I can’t act like them, I can’t talk like them…

Some of these posts hurt my heart and upset me that these people think all of their problems boil down to their introversion. And because we all know that introversion on its own doesn’t need fixing, some are left confused thinking that their behaviour is natural for all introverts.

Fact – Introversion itself is not something that you need therapy or treatment for.

On the other hand, Social anxiety, depression, misanthropy, shyness, low self-esteem, a lack of confidence and poor communication skills are all things that can be changed or improved, if you so choose.

Please don’t allow yourself to conflate issues and problems that can be improved when you work with the right person with your natural introversion.

This Sh** Really Happened!

Eeek – I’ve been in front of the camera again which is not something I usually enjoy. However, when you find a photographer who completely ‘gets you’, it’s a whole different experience.

Back in the spring of 2022 based on the recommendation of someone I really trust, I booked a photoshoot with Brigitta of Nux Photography

As you might imagine, I rather nervous at meeting a new person for the first time who I was immediately going to trust with capturing the essence of who I was. I need not have worried though.

Whilst lively, bright and larger than life, Brigitta identifies as an introvert, so was able to empathise with me and build rapport really quickly. And the outcome was an array of fabulous pics that I’ve been using for the past two and a half years. But that length of time in business when you’re my age is long enough for things to change significantly and the last thing I wanted was for my photos not to reflect who I am now.

And so on Monday of this week, I spent a glorious few hours in the company of Brigitta and her daughter, properly laughing with them as I followed their directions. And I was in good company as also having their photos taken were Nicola and Michelle. That’s not all though – it gets better. My dear friend Helen, a talented beauty therapist kindly came with me to be my make-up artist for the day. It was such fun to watch Helen taking photos of Brigitta taking photos of me!

I’ll soon be able to share some of the official pics and I think you’ll be able to see just how at ease I was.

And, I challenge anyone who says introverts are invisible or like to hide all of the time. Not this one.

Coming up, Buttercup!

It isn’t really inclusive leadership if the leaders are looking at DEI as a tick-box exercise. Inclusion is a serious responsibility and together we must create aware to ensure it is ‘Not Just Lip Service’.

This week, for the Buttercup segment, I give the stage to Szebastian, my colleague and co-founder of our brand ‘Intent to Flourish’. – Joanna Rawbone

–
Thank you Joanna.

I am thrilled to share that on 18 December 2024 we are launching our collaborative Audio Event series – Not Just Lip Service (NJLS).

NJLS is an an innovative audio series dedicated to sparking meaningful conversations that lead to real action in business world and humanity at large.

In the premiere episode, we are focusing on Leadership and Inclusion. In a world where Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) are often treated as mere checkboxes, we aim to discuss and challenge this mindset by exploring the profound responsibility of creating truly inclusive spaces.

Wouldn’t you agree that it isn’t really inclusive leadership if leaders view DEI as a tick-box exercise. Inclusion is more than policies on a piece of paper – what we need it Intentionality, Action, Accountability, for true and equal flourishing of the first to last member of our community.

DEI is Not Just Lip Service – but a sustained commitment – one that requires genuine and intentionally inclusive leadership.

The inaugural episode will feature an engaging panel discussion with four voices from across the globe, offering unique perspectives on this pressing issue. The panel includes two esteemed guests alongside our dynamic hosts, all representing diverse industries and viewpoints from four different locations worldwide. Check-out full details of the event here.

You can join us on LinkedIn or click the buttons below to play on the destination platform of your choice.

Intentionally, – Szebastian – Because. I. Am.

Hot off the Press

Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.

If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.

As ever, I am here in your corner to advocate for you.

Joanna Rawbone
6 December 2024
5 minutes

Festive Season Flourishing Introverts Introvert Extravert Conflicts Introverts IoD My Numerologist Observation Playing to Introvert Strengths Seasonal Sanity Savers

Learning is a journey of trust

Nugget of the Week

There is an old saying which goes “A problem shared is a problem halved”. In the grip of a problem, we’re think we’re being considerate by keeping it to ourselves.

This became really relevant for me this week as a good friend was clearly struggling, but reluctant to ask for help as they didn’t want to trouble anyone else.

But there is real substance behind that old saying which in this age of anxiety, were someone dies by suicide every 90 minutes here in the UK, we’d do well to remember. Sharing with those we trust is not burdening them, it truly is lightening our varied loads.

It can provide emotional relief as you’re expressing feelings and emotions caught in our bodies and brains. As we release what has been trapped, our wellbeing improves. Beware the vulnerability hangover though.
It can provide new perspectives not because those you share with automatically offer their point of view, but because as we speak what we’re struggling with, we often hear both the truth and the fantasy, or catastrophised version of the truth.
It can help you feel supported. Once you truly know that not only are you not alone, but that others genuinely care for you, you can rest easier. Remember we are all human and therefore built for connection; the right type of connection.

All it takes is for you to have both a felt sense and the knowledge that you are safe, with yourself and your chosen sharing partner. I consider it one of the highest compliments anyone can give me.

In Photo: My friend and official photographer – Brigitta (NUX) Scholz Mastroianni

This Sh** Really Happened!

One of the delegates said at the end of the training “Can I have you on speed dial please Jo?” Whilst this may seem quite flattering initially, it’s not quite as it seems.

Now why might I not be flattered? Well, as a change agent, facilitator and coach, I want people to feel confident enough to apply the learning, and if they feel they need me in their back pocket or on speed dial, my job is not yet complete.

One of the ways I measure success in my role is when I’m no longer needed – A bit like Nanny McPhee. I still remember her infamous line “There is something you should understand about the way I work. When you need me but do not want me, then I must stay. When you want me but no longer need me, then I have to go.”

Here’s what I need to clarify though – did this delegate want me more than she needed me? If that’s the case, then I am safe to go and leave her to apply her learning. If not, then I’d be better doing something pretty soon to reinforce her learning and make it stickier.

Maybe I’ll be more Nanny McPhee in future and ask that question.

Coming up, Buttercup!

Does this time of year have you feeling more No, No, No than Ho, Ho, Ho? Don’t despair, my Seasonal Sanity Savers are getting their annual overhaul.

It took me a few years to educate my nearest about how draining I found the whole ‘festive season’. I’d developed a number of ways to keep myself from feeling overwhelmed one day ate a time and they turned into my popular Seasonal Sanity Savers. I mean, why keep something to yourself, when they can help other people.

My husband is so on board with my (and now our) need for calm that he often jokes that we should keep the curtains closed and tell everyone we’ve gone away for Christmas.

So tempting.

Anyway, if you struggle as I did (and sometime still do), make sure you opt-in for my daily hints, tips and boundary reminders that are proven to work. You’ll receive an email every day throughout December, because the stress and pressure of social, workplace and family expectations lasts for the whole month.

And if you are already awash with emails and receiving one more a day through December would just add to your overwhelm, you’ll be delighted to know we’ve thought of that too! You can now access them via LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

I can’t think of a better way to counter feeling depleted and defeated than a daily nudge, a delicious moment of calm amidst the chaos and a pragmatic reminder to look after your wellbeing.

It costs you nothing and may just save your sanity!

Hot off the Press

Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.

If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.

As ever, I am here in your corner to advocate for you.

Joanna Rawbone
29 November 2024
4 minutes

Festive Season Flourishing Introverts Introvert Extravert Conflicts Introverts IoD My Numerologist Observation Playing to Introvert Strengths Seasonal Sanity Savers

And the scary season begins..

Nugget of the Week

Don’t be too quick to rule out an opportunity. I know I’ve recommended that you become discerning about which invitations to accept, but being hasty maybe a mistake.

One thing I have noticed is that if I feel a little fear or anxiety about an invitation, it’d be all too easy to immediately decline and use my need for replenishment as a reason (or excuse).

But here is what I’ve realised. Those very things that stop me in my tracks and question myself are quite possibly the things that will give me the opportunity to grow. And as human’s we’re pre-wired to learn & grow.

So the question I now ask myself is what could I learn about myself or my client base and their challenges by accepting this opportunity?

This simple question has delivered significant return on investment in terms of my knowledge, understanding and confidence. And if I’d declined, I’d be the poorer for it.

This Sh** Really Happened!

When I arrived in London on Monday afternoon, it was tipping down with rain, so I did what any sensible person would do and I took a Black Cab. Did I say sensible?

I thought I was being sensible, but there were several factors that I hadn’t accounted for. Lots of road closures and my driver – Alan.

I began to wonder if there was something wrong with Alan’s cab as it was behaving like a kangaroo; not a pleasant experience. I debated about mentioning this but could see he was an older guy who probably wouldn’t respond well to a woman questioning his driving.

After about 20 minutes of kangarooing at a snail’s pace, I said “Traffic is slow tonight Alan“. Talk about small-talk! But as we know, it’s the gateway conversation starter.

Alan then slid open the divider and said “It is, and forgive me I have a speech impediment.” I said that’s not a problem and we started a more meaningful conversation during which Alan told me in stilted fashion that he was lucky to be alive. Apparently, a few years ago he collapsed (previously undetected hole in his heart) and as he lived on his own, went a few days before someone found him. I immediately felt shame at my judgement of Alan’s kangaroo driving.

For the rest of the journey I was happy to engage Alan in meaningful conversation knowing that once his shift was over, he’d be going back to his empty flat, devoid of company of conversation until his next shift.

Introverts are human too and therefore need connection too. On our own terms.

Coming up, Buttercup!

I can’t look ahead to December without feeling mixed emotions – slight dread at the insanity that often prevails and excitement as I now have tools to handle this season.

Impending insanity because we’re now firmly into the so called ‘festive season’ but that’s not how it feels to many of us.

Of course we introverts will be expected to participate in all the extraverted gatherings with a smile on our face when we’d probably rather stay home and avoid all the noise. But, if we do that we know we’ll be judge as anti-social, boring, stick-in-the-muds. Either that or just plain rude!

However, we know that we’re not anti-social, we’re selectively social. We tend to operate on a different ‘channel’ and need our pre-charging, recharging and a side of intentional self-care.

So many years ago now, I came up with something that I am told time and time again has helped many introverts to cope with the festivities, show up to social gatherings and events whilst maintaining their sanity.

Intrigued?

Then you’ll want my Seasonal Sanity Savers.

They are daily hints, tips and self-care reminders for every day throughout December, not just Advent.

Why?

Because the stress and pressure of social, workplace and family expectations lasts for the whole month, so it makes sense to have support for the whole month.

What better way to counter feeling depleted and defeated than a daily nudge, a delicious moment of calm amidst the chaos and a pragmatic reminder to look after your wellbeing.

Of course, if you want to go through December feeling dread and despondency, you can always ignore this offer.

But if you’re ready for another way, sign-up here.

It costs you nothing and may just save your sanity!

Watch this amazing episode of

(dropping) Pebbles in the Pond,

featuring Frea O’Brien

Making a decision about when to play to which of your introverted strengths is a real gift that can move the needle when you’re feeling stuck. Frea gave us a challenge during her appearance on PITP which Shelley has already accepted and actioned.

Visit her website right here.

Some of the Watch Buttons below will work closer or on the date of event only.

Hot off the Press

Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.

If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.

I look forward to you tuning in and always welcome and appreciate your feedback!

Joanna Rawbone
22 November 2024
4 minutes

Festive Season Flourishing Introverts Introvert Extravert Conflicts Introverts IoD My Numerologist Observation Playing to Introvert Strengths Seasonal Sanity Savers

Turning the tide with determination..

Nugget of the Week

In the same way that I’m serious about my gratitude practice, I’ve joined Dr David Hamilton’s 21-day Kindfulness experiment and day one started with noticing examples of kindness.

If you’ve been in my world for more than a moment, you’ll know that I’m a big fan of noticing, so the whole experiment started well for me. Dr David encouraged us to notice simple examples of kindness, like when someone lets you stitch in the queue of traffic or holds the lift door for you.

Here’s why I think there is a nugget here for we introverts. Too many introvert memes celebrate an introvert’s joy at the lift doors closing before the other person can get in. Really? The kind soul in me always looks to see if anyone is clearly trying to catch my attention and rushing towards the lift and I hold the doors for them.

So, I’m not here to judge but please notice when you could choose to be kinder and choose that.

This Sh** Really Happened!

One of the people I admire most in the world listened intently as I told him about the book I’m currently writing. After a beautiful introverted pause he said …

… “That’s a fantastic idea”.

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t asking for or looking for validation, but when an eminent strategist, author and successful business person says that, I have to admit to feeling more than a tingle of excitement.

Later he sent me a text reiterating his thoughts and wrote this “I love the idea of your book. I think you’re onto a winner!”

November has been marked for book writing and that time is sacrosanct in my calendar.

Coming up, Buttercup!

Come 18 November, I am excited to be on a panel with incredible speakers as we all share our unique perspectives on creating a memorable personal brand.

Meet the speakers:

Clinton Jordan – Known as “The Motivational Vocal Coach,” Clinton teased on how to make your voice a powerful tool in building a brand with impact and authenticity.

Lorraine Milligan – A high-fashion stylist and photographer, Lorraine gave a hint on the art of visual storytelling and how to create a lasting first impression that showcases your best self.

Laura Toop – As the creator of #ProjectMe, Laura gave us a little taste of how overcoming adversity can strengthen your brand, sharing her own journey of resilience and growth.

Joanna Rawbone, yours truly – Founder of Flourishing Introverts, I shared a little preview of my insights on branding from an introvert’s perspective, demonstrating how intentional presence can help introverts shine.

Watch this quick catch-up to get a taste of what’s to come..

To gain deeper insight reserve your FREE place on 18th November 2024 head here.

Watch this amazing episode of (dropping) Pebbles in the Pond, featuring Frea O'Brien

Frea has a pretty traditional background including being a Masters Graduate from London School of Economics. She knows so well how to play to her strengths and her business now is about helping people play to their so they showcase their natural brilliance.

You might be surprised how.

This is a conversation I truly enjoyed and I know will cherish for a long time. Our audience felt the same way too. Here’s a little preview.

Some of the Watch Buttons below will work closer or on the date of event only.

Hot off the Press

Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.

If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.

I look forward to you tuning in and as you do, and in coming days there is much excitement I have to share with you. Gently and step by step!

Joanna Rawbone
15 November 2024
3 minutes

Chris Packham Clinton Jordan Conflict Management Dreams Flourishing Introverts Frea O'Brien Introvert Extravert Conflicts Laura Toop Lorraine Milligan Playing to Introvert Strengths Project Me

This too shall pass

Boundaries are our friends...

Nugget of the Week

When it comes to ‘dealing with the difficult’, we all have our own ways of procrastinating and justifying why we can’t tackle things now, or head on come to that.

The reality is that the longer we leave things the more difficult they become. If we’re leaving them hoping they will improve on their own, more often than not we’ll be disappointed.

More than that, the longer things bubble on for, the more stress we feel, and prolonged, low grade stress is worse for our mental and physical health than the short sharp bursts.
So, do yourself a favour and take the bull by the proverbials. It’s the only thing that really makes sense.

This Sh** Really Happened!

Since when did we stop being able to sit around a camp fire and rationally explore different points of view. However unpalatable someone contrary view may seem to you, that doesn’t necessarily make them a bad person or wrong.

How will we even be able to value diversity if we’re intolerant of difference? Before you get all huffy with me and insist I don’t understand, but do any of us really?

As my dear friend Mary Alice Arthur says, “We’re in the messy middle” and that’s an integral part of being human. So, learn to get down and dirty, embrace the discomfort, and focus on the learning. Because it’s there if we look hard enough for it.

Coming up, Buttercup!

Standing Out in a Busy World. In this short video, Laura Toop, creator of #ProjectMe, introduces three noted professionals who bring their unique perspectives on creating a memorable personal brand, including yours humbly and truly.

In this preview:

Clinton Jordan – Known as “The Motivational Vocal Coach,” Clinton teased on how to make your voice a powerful tool in building a brand with impact and authenticity.

Lorraine Milligan – A high-fashion stylist and photographer, Lorraine gave a hint on the art of visual storytelling and how to create a lasting first impression that showcases your best self.

Laura Toop – As the creator of #ProjectMe, Laura gave us a little taste of how overcoming adversity can strengthen your brand, sharing her own journey of resilience and growth.

Joanna Rawbone, yours truly – Founder of Flourishing Introverts, I shared a little preview of my insights on branding from an introvert’s perspective, demonstrating how intentional presence can help introverts shine.

Do note, this video offers just a glimpse of the hands-on learning, interactive workshops, and networking opportunities awaiting you on 18th November. It’s your chance to elevate your personal brand and make an unforgettable impact.

Watch this quick catch-up to get a taste of what’s to come..

To gain deeper insight reserve your FREE place on 18th November 2024 head here.

In the next episode of (dropping) Pebbles in the Pond, meet Frea O'Brien

Frea has a pretty traditional background including being a Masters Graduate from London School of Economics. She knows so well how to play to her strengths and her business now is about helping people play to their so they showcase their natural brilliance.

You might be surprised how.

Join Frea and I, on Thursday, 14 November at 7 PM London time, here!

Some of the Watch Buttons below will work closer or on the date of event only.

Hot off the Press

Released this week by the House of Flourishing Introverts.

If you rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify as well as Like, Comment and Share the YouTube video you will be helping other fellow introverts who may find this content helpful, encouraging them to live a more fulfilled and authentic life.

I look forward to you tuning in and as you do, and in coming days there is much excitement I have to share with you. Gently and step by step!

Joanna Rawbone
8 November 2024
3 minutes

Chris Packham Clinton Jordan Conflict Management Dreams Flourishing Introverts Frea O'Brien Introvert Extravert Conflicts Laura Toop Lorraine Milligan Playing to Introvert Strengths Project Me